The question is…. are you ready to date and be in a relationship? Don’t think of it as having to be a specific age like at 14 or 15 you’ll magically be ready, because everyone matures at a different pace.  But these might be some questions you’d want to ask yourself in order to really know if now is a good time or do I have to work on myself a little bit more first?

• Do I have the emotional maturity to experience rejection or a break-up?
• Do I possess the ability to communicate well enough to be in a relationship with others?
• What are my friendships like? Can this help me discern my readiness for dating?
• What areas do I need to grow in, in order to handle the various kinds of experiences I could have in dating?
• Am I a good judge of character?
• Am I secure in myself? Respect myself? Do I know my value?

After considering these questions, it’s possible that the answer is no, I’m not ready to date quite yet.  Just keep in mind, if you are ready, inevitably, there will be some hurt involved.   Even in the scenario where you might meet your childhood sweetheart and eventually get married and live happily-ish ever after, there will still be emotional highs and lows. You will need the help and comfort of your parents or other trusted adults to help coach you through these highs and lows.

It will also be helpful to have conversations with your trusted adults or parents about attraction, expectations, and boundaries. Are you attracted to the right things? Do you only talk about being physically attracted to someone? Or do you think about other reasons for being attracted to someone? Are your expectations around dating too optimistic or too pessimistic? Do you understand appropriate levels of emotional sharing and physical touch?

These are a lot of things to consider. It’s normal to feel a little overwhelmed.  Think about pacing yourself. Take your time, don’t feel like you have to rush into anything.  If anyone makes you feel pressured to hang out with them or always be with them, then that is not the right relationship for you.  Being single is perfectly fine and you have plenty of time to be in a relationship.  So try to take the pressure off of yourself about needing to find that ‘perfect’ person.  If you have any questions about dating or anything related, please feel free to reach out to the REALife team and submit a question as seen on the right hand side of our homepage.